Samhain Publishing

Lianon stamped the dirt from her boots and finger-combed her hair before heading back into the house. Biso followed her in—he was the only one of the dogs permitted inside—and she let her fingers trail along his thick, muscled neck as he passed her on his way to his favorite patch of sunlight under the window. Kaela was busy in the kitchen. Pretending to be busy, that is, industriously scrubbing a worktable that already appeared pristine.

“Hullo,” Lianon ventured.

Kaela’s glance lifted briefly to Lianon’s, then dropped back to her washcloth. “I’ve made jaffha.”

Lianon reached out and placed her hand on Kaela’s vigorously scrubbing one. “Sit and have a cup with me?” The girl’s face reddened, but she was brave enough to nod.

The lid of the jaffha pot rattled as Kaela lifted it. Lianon gently took it from her grasp and poured for them both. Kaela sank slowly down to perch on the edge of her chair and folded her hands in her lap as if she didn’t trust them to hold her cup.

Lianon leaned back in her seat and took a long sip. “We have some things to discuss, you and I.”

Kaela looked like she might throw up. “I—”

“Do you know why I asked you to come live with us?”

Kaela’s brimming eyes met hers, and her hands twisted in her lap. “Because you felt sorry for me?”

“Yes. And because you reminded me of someone.”

Kaela sniffed and dabbed at her tears. “Who?”

Lianon set her cup down and held the girl’s gaze. “My wife,” she said gently.

Kaela’s eyes widened and her tears dried up. “What?”

“My wife. Rhianna.”

“I…I don’t understand.”

Lianon smiled. “I was an Emissary in Sylphae. I lived as a man then—” she glanced wryly down at her trousers and shirt, “—though you’ll probably realize I haven’t changed so much. One afternoon I was collecting payment for a job—just a simple retrieval of a wayward son from a bad situation. The degenerate’s father was a good man, wealthy, a landowner but not titled. He had me right into his salon, fed me Kahlian tea and little lemon cakes. The girl who served us, his niece—gods, she was the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen. She leaned over the little table to pour and her hair tumbled over her shoulder in the sunlight, and I could just see the slightest curves above the lace of her bodice. Then she smiled at me, and that was all it took. In that moment I loved her.”

Kaela stared, appalled. “But she was a woman!”

Lianon hid her smile behind her cup. “Yes.”

“But, you and Gil—”

“Yes.”

Kaela frowned in bemusement. “Oh.”

Lianon set her cup down and leaned forward. “I have been blessed to know the love of three people in my life. The first was Samulo, my teacher.”

“The Kurgan?” If anything, Kaela was more scandalized by this than by Rhianna.

“Yes.”

“You…loved him?” From the look on her face, the word was like castor oil in her mouth.

Lianon smiled. “I still do.”

Kaela frowned. “What about Rhianna? Do you still love her too?”

God help me, yes. More than anything. I love her so much, I still sometimes feel her there beside me when I wake.

Even now, it took all Lianon’s will to keep her voice steady. “Rhianna is dead.”

Kaela’s hand flew to her mouth and her eyes filled with tears once more. “Lianon, I’m so sorry. What happened?”

Lianon took a deep breath and counted to ten in her head. “The man who raped you. Sur-Marus. His son Brian and three of his friends raped and killed her.”

“Oh, no!” Kaela whispered. “Oh, Lianon.”

“I was there. I saw it all, but I couldn’t help her. I’d been out of the business for more than a year. Rhianna, ah…” Lianon swallowed and started again. “She wouldn’t be courted by a man who made his living with a sword. She could even accept, when I finally had the courage to tell her, that I was a woman, but she would not wed an Emissary. So I gave up the life. For her. When we were married, her uncle gave us a small farmstead and thirty sheep. We’d only been living there for a few months when Brian and his friends…”

She stopped, clenching her hands in her lap. “It was a good life. Peaceful. I’d stopped training, lost muscle and reflexes. My gear was put away in a trunk, useless. As useless as I was. When they broke in…”

“Oh, Lianon. It wasn’t your fault. There wasn’t anything you could have done.”

I could have died with her. I could have told them what I was and let them have me too, so she wouldn’t have to endure alone. Shaking herself, Lianon forced the conversation back onto stable ground. “There is something I can do for you, Kaela.”

The girl’s cheeks turned bright pink and Lianon’s stomach did a little flip. “What do you mean?”

“After yesterday—after the messenger scared you,” she clarified, feeling her own face go warm at the memory of Kaela in the doorway looking in, “I started thinking. Maybe you would like to learn how to defend yourself.”

“What, with a sword?” Kaela blurted on a laugh. Lianon thrilled inside to hear the sound of it. “I couldn’t possibly—”

“No, not with a sword. With your hands and feet and whatever might be lying around that you could use as a weapon. It might not stop a man from attacking, but it might make him regret choosing you as a target.”

Kaela thought for a moment, her eyes narrowed on Lianon’s face. “All right.”

Lianon stood, slapping the table with one hand as if to seal the bargain. “Good. Excellent. Let’s get started right away.”

Kaela rose with considerably more caution, misgivings already surfacing on her face. “What do we do first?”

Lianon grinned. “First, we find you some clothes.”